Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Rain, Rain go away!

Is anyone else tired of the rain?!  It seems like it rains every day...or at least every other!  WOW!  On the plus side, Dustin and I were sitting in the living room last night in the dark (because our power was once again out) when Dustin noticed a beautiful rainbow outside.  It was really cool!  The sky was dark and stormy but there was a very vivid rainbow!  Amazing, awe inspiring, awesome! 

Other than the rain, it feels like not much new has been happening here in the Donovan household.  We have a bunch of graduation parties to attend this weekend, and a hit a few last weekend too.  We are packing to leave to go to the Maibach cabin in Michigan next week for some time away together.  I think that will be fun!  We have a few friends going with us so it should be a good time.  Its nice to have the cabin to go to for an inexpensive getaway! 

On the babymaking front, we still dont know what we are doing.  I really feel torn between decisions!  I strongly feel like the embryos we adopted were meant to be for us.  But we cannot afford to do it.  Because my insurance wont cover the procedure, we need to pay the fees upfront.  Its not that expensive (if you think 6 grand is cheap) but we just do not have that kind of money to put down!  The other option is to sell back the embryos, use that money towards IVF and hope that it works this time.  We have 3 more weeks until we need to know what we are doing for sure!  I keep praying for a sign.  Im not very perceptive and I know God knows this:  Im begging to wake up some morning and have the words spraypainted on my living room wall!  ha!  I really thought I knew when we adopted the embryos and I still feel lead in that direction....but the cost of it is impossible!  So, Im not sure what to do.  If we go the IVF route, it will only cost us about 2 thousand since 80% of it would be covered by insurance!

 Dustin says he is okay with either of the two routes....but only those two options!  The doctor is really pushing for us to use a sperm donor if we do IVF but we have agreed not to.  My dear husband is not comfortable with the idea that the child would be half mine, but not any of his!  He prefers that it be all of ours, or none of ours....I can see his point and wholly agree to follow his decisions on this! 

What to do, what to do....Ill just keep on praying and hope that we know soon!

1 comment:

  1. Oh my, I cannot imagine making a decision like that! I will be praying for you!!!