Friday, March 26, 2010

Diary of a Clumsy Oaf...

It seems as though every thing I touch lately breaks within moments of being in my posession!  Let me recount the past few weeks and thier little "incidents":

*  I dropped the HACH meter at work (that we use to test the water for Chlorine breakthru every 4 hours) and it wouldnt turn back on.  I WAS able to "fix" it about 3 hours later, after totally ticking off the charge nurse....the steam was visible coming out of her ears!

*  I primed my saline bag right into an electrical socket.  Not only did I get shocked (FUN!  I assure you!) but I also blew up the outlet and the dialysis machine! 

*  I dropped a piece of just buttered (heavily!) homemade garlic bread on my brand new L.L. Bean shirt....I had only been wearing it for literally 10 min....for the first time EVER!

*  I dropped my toothbrush in the toilet!  Not kidding!

*  I let two kids who were screwing around kick a hole in the center consel of my truck!  D chewed me out for that one!

*  I  drove D's truck and somehow, mysteriously, there is now a big dent in the side that wasnt there before!  I swear I did not hit anything! 

*  I spilled an entire can of pop into our toaster.  Luckily it was not plugged in or I would have probably received another shock! 

So.....for those of you who are considering asking me to babysit anytime soon....you may want to reconsider.  I am not clumsy on purpose...but I cannot guarantee your child will be returned in one piece!  Ha!  I better sign off now before I break my laptop....

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